‫- PREVIOUSLY ON AWKWARD...
‫- NEITHER OF US HOOKS UP.
‫IF WE SEE THE OTHER FLIRTING,
‫THEN WE SWOOP IN ‫AND STOP IT
‫LIKE A... ‫- REVERSE WINGMAN.
‫- I'M NATALIE. ‫COME UPSTAIRS?
‫- DADDY, WHAT'S GOING ON?
‫- HAVE YOU GUYS SEEN MATTY? ‫- HE TOOK OFF
‫WITH SOME OLDER CHICK.
‫- GREETINGS, PHHSERS!
‫COME ON DOWN ‫TO THE CAREER FAIR TODAY
‫AND FIND OUT ‫IF YOU HAVE GOOD REASON
‫TO BE SCARED ‫OUT OF YOUR GOURDS.
‫- TODAY WAS THE DAY
‫THAT SCU SENT OUT THEIR ‫ADMISSION DECISIONS.
‫ANY MINUTE NOW, ‫I'D RECEIVE AN EMAIL
‫THAT COULD ‫CHANGE MY LIFE FOREVER.
‫AND THE GREAT THING ‫ABOUT IT?
‫I WASN'T SCARED.
‫I'D KICKED ASS ‫IN MY INTERVIEW
‫AND ACED ‫THE LAST SEMESTER.
‫LIFE WAS...
‫- JENNA. ‫HOW'S IT GOING?
‫- A REAL BITCH SOMETIMES.
‫- OH, IT'S--IT'S OWEN.
‫WE KISSED ‫ON NEW YEAR'S EVE.
‫- YEAH, YEAH, RIGHT. ‫I KNEW THAT.
‫- YOU HAD NO IDEA ‫I WENT HERE, DID YOU?
‫- NOT UNTIL I SAW YOU AT ‫THE CAFETERIA A COUPLE DAYS AGO.
‫I'M SORRY.
‫- BUT I'M ONLY ‫TWO GRADES BELOW YOU.
‫- WOW! DID YOU GO THROUGH ‫A GROWTH SPURT?
‫- A BIG ONE, LAST SUMMER.
‫YEAH, IT WAS, UH, ‫VERY PAINFUL.
‫SO LISTEN, UM, ‫YOU KNOW HOW YOU TOLD ME
‫THAT YOU WISHED YOU KNEW MORE ‫ABOUT CLASSICAL MUSIC?
‫- SURE.
‫- COOL. ‫WELL, I, UM...
‫GOT YOU THE PERFECT BOOK ‫TO READ.
‫- WOW.
‫THANK YOU, OWEN.
‫THAT IS SO SWEET.
‫OKAY, WELL, I, UH-- ‫I BETTER GET RUNNING.
‫- ALL RIGHT, ‫WELL, UH, TALK SOON, I HOPE.
‫- MM-HMM.
‫- HEY!
‫WHATCHA READING?
‫- IT'S NOTHING.
‫- OH, COME ON, ‫LET ME SEE IT.
‫- NO. ‫- LET ME SEE IT.
‫- NO. ‫- LET ME SEE.
‫- STOP IT! STOP-- ‫- WHAT--
‫"CRACKING THE CLASSICS:
‫MOZART, BACH, AND CHOPIN ‫FOR BEGINNERS."
‫NEVER PEGGED YOU ‫FOR A MUSIC GEEK.
‫- YEAH, IT'S FOR SCHOOL. ‫GIVE IT BACK.
‫- SURE, SURE. ‫TALK TO YOU LATER.
‫- I FELT BAD ‫KEEPING OWEN A SECRET,
‫BUT I DIDN'T WANT MATTY ‫TO FIND OUT
‫THAT I HAD BROKEN ‫OUR NO HOOK-UP PLEDGE.
‫AND OWEN WAS SO YOUNG, ‫A SOPHOMORE,
‫WHICH WOULD MAKE ME ‫A COUGAR
‫AT THE RIPE OLD AGE OF 17.
‫[school bell rings]
‫T, YOU EXCITED ABOUT ‫HEARING FROM SCU?
‫YOU MUST HAVE BEEN DREAMING ‫ABOUT THIS DAY SINCE PRESCHOOL.
‫- EXCITED? ‫I'M A KANYE MESS.
‫IN CASE YOU FORGOT,
‫I PUKED ALL OVER MY CHANCES ‫OF GETTING INTO SCU.
‫LITERALLY.
‫- OKAY, SO YOU PUKED ‫DURING YOUR INTERVIEW.
‫NO BIG DEAL.
‫YOU HAVE A 7.0 GPA.
‫- 5.2 WEIGHTED.
‫BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER. ‫I'M TOAST.
‫YOU, ON THE OTHER HAND, ‫YOU KILLED IT.
‫THEY LOVED YOU.
‫YOUR ACCEPTANCE IS PRACTICALLY ‫SIGNED, SEALED, DELIVERED, BABY.
‫[phone chimes]
‫- OH, MY GOD!
‫I GOT INTO SCU!
‫- SHUT UP, I GOT IN TOO!
‫- O TO ALL THE MOTHER-EFFING ‫Gs--I'M IN!
‫JENNA?
‫- UM, DOES ANYONE ELSE ‫NOT HAVE A SIGNAL?
‫[phones beeping ‫and chiming]
‫I'M GONNA GO OUTSIDE ‫TO GET A BETTER SIGNAL.
‫MY RECEPTION WAS FINE.
‫IT WAS MY FUTURE ‫THAT WAS IN THE DEAD ZONE.
‫[typing]
‫- JENNA, ‫THAT'S B-A-N-A-N-A-S
‫THAT YOU HAVEN'T HEARD ‫FROM SCU YET.
‫DO YOU WANT ME TO CALL THEM?
‫I HAVE THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE ‫PHONE NUMBER.
‫- IT'S OKAY. ‫I CAN WAIT.
‫- HA. MY FIRST ACCEPTANCE.
‫THANK GOD ‫I'M TAMARA KA-PLANNER
‫AND THOUGHT ‫TO SEND NOTES TO SCU
‫FROM MY GP, OBGYN, ‫AND MY PSYCHOLOGIST
‫EXPLAINING THAT THE REASON I WAS ‫SO CRAY DURING MY INTERVIEW
‫IS 'CAUSE OF MY ‫OSGOOD-SCHLATTER'S.
‫- WHAT'S OSGOOD-SCHLATTER'S?
‫- NO IDEA, ‫BUT IT TOTES WORKED.
‫NOW I CAN FINALLY ‫GO ON SNOOZE CRUISE CONTROL
‫AND GET BACK ‫TO MY [bleep] IT LIST.
‫- WHAT'S LEFT ON THERE? ‫- STUFF THAT WOULD EFF UP
‫MY FLAWLESS PERMANENT RECORD.
‫O.M.G., MAYBE TODAY ‫WILL FINALLY BE THE DAY
‫I GET MY FIRST DETENTION.
‫COME ON, JENNA, LET'S GO BE ‫TEEN TRASH TOGETHER.
‫- UH, RAIN CHECK.
‫I'M NOT REALLY ‫FEELING SO GOOD.
‫[school bell rings]
‫MOM, CAN YOU PICK ME UP?
‫I THINK I'M SICK.
‫- YEAH, YOU DO LOOK AWFUL.
‫- MOM? ‫WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
‫- I TOLD YOU, HONEY.
‫WE'RE HELPING OUT ‫AT THE CAREER FAIR.
‫I'M PASSING OUT MAPS.
‫- AND I'M TALKING ‫ABOUT THE WINDOW BIZ.
‫YOU CAN'T LEAVE.
‫WHO'S GONNA HELP ME HOLD UP ‫THIS GORGEOUS GAL?
‫- GORGEOUS ‫AND AN OFFER TO STANFORD.
‫IT'S GOOD TO BE GABBY.
‫- I'D RATHER BE ME ‫AND IVY LEAGUE.
‫- HEY, GABBY.
‫- NOT NOW.
‫- WELL, I BELIEVE THAT'S ‫A SCORE FOR MATTY MCKIBBEN.
‫- NOT EVEN IN THE GAME, ‫JACOB.
‫- YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I SAY ‫WHEN I GET DISSED TOO.
‫- YOUR LAST GIRLFRIEND ‫WASN'T A PSYCHO.
‫OKAY, NOT AS PSYCHO.
‫SHE'S HOT, ‫BUT I'M NOT LOOKING.
‫- YOU KNOW, I THINK I HAD ‫CLASS WITH HER ONCE.
‫SHE SEEMED KINDA ‫STUCK-UP TO ME.
‫- KIND OF?
‫SHE IS THE QUEEN ‫OF INTIMIDATION NATION--
‫THOSE SMART JOCK BITCHES ‫WHO SPEND EVERY WAKING MINUTE
‫OBSESSED WITH ATHLETICS
‫AND ACTING SUPERIOR ‫TO THOSE WHO AREN'T.
‫- COME ON, MAGIC MATTY.
‫TIME TO DUST OFF ‫THE WAND.
‫- THE INTIMIDATION NATION ‫ONLY DATE COLLEGE GUYS.
‫YOU DON'T STAND A CHANCE.
‫- REALLY. ‫IS THAT SO?
‫THAT IS QUITE THE NICE STROKE ‫YOU GOT THERE.
‫IT'S MATTY.
‫- I KNOW WHO YOU ARE, ‫MCKIBBEN.
‫- POOR MCKITTEN.
‫LOOKS LIKE SHE GOT HER BALL ‫AND YOURS.
‫- SO, JENNA, WHEN I'M ‫ENLIGHTENING YOUR PEEPS
‫ON THE SYNERGY OF STYLE ‫AND ENERGY SAVINGS
‫OF DOUBLE-HUNG ‫SASH WINDOWS,
‫YOU HOLD UP ‫THIS SAMPLE, OKAY?
‫- YEAH, SURE.
‫- HEY, IS EVERYTHING OKAY?
‫- ACTUALLY, DAD, ‫ABOUT SCU--
‫- WAIT, LET ME GUESS. ‫YOU HAVEN'T HEARD BACK YET.
‫WELL, DON'T WORRY, I GOT ‫MY ACCEPTANCE LATE TOO.
‫DOESN'T MEAN ANYTHING. ‫- J!
‫- HEY, VALERIE, ‫QUICK QUESTION.
‫DO COLLEGES EVER CHANGE ‫THEIR MIND AFTER A REJECTION?
‫I'M JUST ASKING ‫FOR A FRIEND.
‫- OH. NO, NEVER.
‫NO, THAT SHIP HAS SAILED ‫INTO THE DEEP BLUE SEA.
‫- THEN I WAS SINKING ‫FASTER THAN THE TITANIC.
‫- HEY, JENNA.
‫UH, WHEN YOU'RE DONE ‫WITH THAT BOOK,
‫WOULD YOU WANNA GO SEE ‫SOME CLASSICAL MUSIC WITH ME?
‫- I CAN'T GO OUT ‫WITH YOU, OWEN.
‫- BUT WHY?
‫I MEAN, I JUST KINDA THOUGHT ‫THAT YOU LIKED ME,
‫AND, I MEAN, WE HAD FUN ‫TOGETHER, DIDN'T WE?
‫- WE DID AND I DO, BUT-- ‫- BUT WHAT?
‫- I CAN'T REALLY GIVE YOU ‫A GOOD REASON, OKAY?
‫EXCEPT FOR THAT SOMETIMES
‫THINGS DON'T WORK OUT ‫THE WAY YOU WANT
‫NO MATTER HOW BADLY ‫YOU WANT THEM TOO.
‫IT DOESN'T MATTER ‫IF YOU WORK YOUR ASS OFF
‫OR YOU GIVE ‫AN AMAZING INTERVIEW
‫OR YOU HAVE AN ALUM PARENT.
‫YOU CAN STILL GET REJECTED, ‫OKAY?
‫AND THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS.
‫IT HAPPENS TO EVERYONE.
‫AND I'M SORRY, ‫BUT I JUST CAN'T HELP IT.
‫- HEY.
‫HEY, I HEARD YOU ALREADY ‫SIGNED A LETTER OF INTENT
‫TO PLAY TENNIS ‫AT STANFORD.
‫THAT'S HUGE. ‫CONGRATS.
‫- IT'S CUTE THAT YOU THINK ‫FLATTERING ME
‫WILL MAKE ME WANT ‫TO TALK TO YOU.
‫- "CUTE"?
‫DOES THAT MEAN ‫IT'S WORKING?
‫- NOPE.
‫- STRIKE TWO, BUDDY.
‫- HEY, KIDS.
‫PLEASE WELCOME TO THE STAGE ‫A PHHS ALUM.
‫SHE IS BRILLIANT.
‫SHE IS SUCCESSFUL.
‫SHE'S GOT A GREAT ‫SET OF GAMS.
‫SHE'S...ME, ‫VALERIE MARKS.
‫[laughs] ‫[students groan]
‫OH, HOW I WISH ‫THAT WERE TRUE.
‫IT'S CORPORATE LAWYER, ‫NATALIE THOMPSON.
‫- THANKS, VAL. ‫IT'S TRULY AN HONOR
‫TO BE BACK AT PHHS.
‫- WHAT A LOT OF PEOPLE ‫DON'T UNDERSTAND
‫ABOUT PEOPLE WHO BROKER ‫AND INSTALL CUSTOM WINDOWS
‫IS THAT WE'RE ‫VERY CREATIVE.
‫[ahem]
‫MY LOVELY DAUGHTER, JENNA, ‫ACTING AS MY ASSISTANT TODAY.
‫SHE MIGHT EVEN WANT TO ‫TAKE OVER THE FAMILY BUSINESS
‫AFTER SHE GRADUATES ‫FROM MY ALMA MATER, SCU.
‫RIGHT, HONEY?
‫NOW WHAT WINDOW DO YOU THINK ‫WOULD LOOK BETTER
‫IN A RANCH STYLE HOME?
‫THIS ONE OR... ‫THIS ONE?
‫- LAME.
‫I THOUGHT THIS WAS ‫MICROSOFT WINDOWS.
‫- TAKE A YEAR OFF ‫AFTER HIGH SCHOOL
‫AND HELP SPREAD THE WORD ‫OF JESUS CHRIST
‫IN SUPER FUN PLACES ‫LIKE UGANDA AND DETROIT.
‫[sighs]
‫I REALLY HOPE PEOPLE COME ‫EXPERIENCE HELL TENT
‫AND WANT TO BECOME MISSIONARIES ‫LIKE MOMMY AND DADDY.
‫[ominous organ chords]
‫- IT'S QUITE ‫A FASCINATING RITUAL.
‫- IT'S NOT A RITUAL. ‫HELL TENT SHOWS NON-BELIEVERS
‫WHAT HAPPENS IN THE AFTERLIFE ‫IF YOU DON'T ACCEPT J.C.
‫[inhales] ‫I PLAY THE GUARDIAN ANGEL
‫WHO STEERS THEM ON THE PATH ‫OF RIGHTEOUSNESS.
‫- ACTUALLY, THERE'S BEEN ‫A CHANGE OF PLANS, CUPCAKE.
‫[ominous organ chords]
‫[drums beating]
‫- [grunts]
‫- NOW, KIDS, THIS IS ‫WHAT HAPPENS
‫WHEN YOU'RE UNABLE ‫TO RESIST TYLER.
‫OOPS, I MEAN LUST.
‫- YOU SHALL HATE THE WHORE ‫AND MAKE HER, LIKE,
‫REALLY DESOLATE.
‫THEN YOU'LL EAT HER FLESH ‫AND BURN HER WITH FIRE?
‫EW, THAT'S NOT GOING ‫TO REALLY HAPPEN TO ME, IS IT?
‫- WE'LL SEE.
‫AND THIS IS ‫JESUS CHRIST.
‫[dramatic music]
‫- IF THOU SHALT ‫DISOBEY ME EVER,
‫I WILL SEE TO IT ‫THAT YOU ALL GO TO HELL.
‫SO DON'T SWEAR, ‫DON'T DRINK,
‫AND NEVER, EVER WEAR ‫THOSE HORRIFIC OUTFITS
‫IN MY PRESENCE AGAIN.
‫JESUS SAYS, ‫"YOU'RE WELCOME."
‫- GOSH,
‫WHERE'S YOUR FATHER ‫WHEN YOU NEED HIM?
‫- HONEY, SWEETHEART, ‫I AM SO SORRY I'M LATE.
‫THAT MASSAGE WAS SO DEEP,
‫I JUST DOZED OFF ‫RIGHT THERE ON THE TABLE.
‫- I'M JUST GLAD ‫YOU MADE IT.
‫DO YOU LIKE MY COSTUME?
‫IT'S CUTE, HUH?
‫- SURE, SURE.
‫BUT, TYLER, WOWZA!
‫YOU MUST BE LUST.
‫- INDEED I AM.
‫- DOESN'T HE FIT ‫THE PART PERFECTLY?
‫OH, HERE, TYLER. ‫SPRAY ON SOME OIL.
‫LUST SHOULD BE ALL ‫HOT AND SWEATY.
‫[giggles]
‫- LISSA, WHEN ARE YOU ‫GOING TO TELL YOUR MOM
‫THAT YOUR DAD IS ‫A BIG GAY GAY?
‫- THAT WAS ‫A ONE-TIME THING, SADIE.
‫I THINK HE ‫WAS JUST CONFUSED.
‫- CAN'T BE EASY TO COME OUT TO A ‫JUDGMENTAL SLORE LIKE YOUR MOM.
‫- MY MOM'S NOT JUDGMENTAL.
‫SHE JUST KNOWS ‫RIGHT FROM WRONG.
‫- SHE'S PUNISHING YOU ‫FOR HAVING FEELINGS FOR TYLER
‫WHEN THERE'S NOTHING ‫WRONG WITH IT.
‫AND I THOUGHT MY FAMILY ‫WAS [bleep] UP.
‫- AS A WOMAN, ‫IT CAN BE DIFFICULT
‫BEING IN ‫AN ALL-BOYS CLUB.
‫BUT IN THE END, HARD WORK ‫IS WHAT WILL BRING YOU SUCCESS,
‫NOT YOUR GENDER.
‫- I GOT TO GO.
‫- WHERE ARE YOU GOING?
‫- JAKE?
‫WHAT ARE YOU ‫DOING HERE?
‫YOU STALKING ME?
‫- [chuckles]
‫NO, I, UM...I HAVE A BOOTH.
‫- REALLY? ‫WHERE?
‫- UM...
‫- I JUST WANTED TO SAY WOW, ‫WHAT A WONDERFUL SPEECH.
‫AND AS A FELLOW FEMINIST ‫IN THE STRUGGLE,
‫I APPLAUD YOU FOR BEING ‫SUCH A BAD-ASS.
‫AND YOU, MR. ROSATI,
‫I'LL BE SEEING ‫IN DETENTION LATER.
‫PANTSING A FRESHMAN ‫IN GYM CLASS?
‫VERY ORIGINAL.
‫- UH...I KNOW YOU MUST BE
‫REALLY CONFUSED RIGHT NOW,
‫BUT I CAN EXPLAIN. ‫I--
‫- WE CAN'T TALK HERE.
‫MEET ME AT MY CAR ‫IN AN HOUR.
‫- WAS THAT YOUR ‫NEW YEAR'S MILF?
‫- OH, YEAH.
‫- I THINK YOU'RE THE ONE ‫WITH A LITTLE CRUSH.
‫[chuckles]
‫- JENNA, THAT AUTHOR, ‫SAMANTHA PERRY, IS HERE.
‫SHE WENT TO PHHS AND SCU.
‫AREN'T YOU A FAN ‫OF HERS?
‫- YES. ‫DAD, PLEASE SPARE ME.
‫- I CAN SPARE ME. ‫LET'S GO.
‫- SIGN ME UP ‫FOR THE NEXT SEASON OF
‫THE BAD GIRLS CLUB, ‫'CAUSE I JUST DID THREE THINGS
‫ON MY [bleep] IT LIST AT ONCE. ‫[chuckles]
‫CUT CLASS, CHECK.
‫BREAK DRESS CODE, ‫CHECK.
‫AND SMOKE AN E-CIG ‫IN THE SANCTUARY,
‫HELL, YEAH, CHECK.
‫OH. HI, ‫MR. AND MRS. HAMILTON.
‫SO, JENNA, IS SCU STILL ‫BEING A DISTANT DIVA?
‫- HEY. MY DAUGHTER JENNA, ‫TWO Ns, LOVES YOUR WORK.
‫SHE WANTS TO BE A WRITER ‫JUST LIKE YOU
‫WHEN SHE GROWS UP. ‫- MOM, STOP.
‫- AW, THAT'S GREAT.
‫- SHE'S PLANNING ON STUDYING ‫CREATIVE WRITING AT SCU.
‫- YEAH! ‫- OH, WOW.
‫THEY HAVE ‫AN INCREDIBLE PROGRAM.
‫THEY WHIPPED MY BUTT ‫INTO SHAPE.
‫- OH, [chuckles] ‫- MOM, STOP.
‫- "DEAR, JENNA, CONGRATS ‫ON SCU." [chuckles]
‫- ISN'T THAT SWEET?
‫- I DIDN'T GET IN, OKAY?
‫I DIDN'T GET IN TO SCU.
‫- OH, NO, YOUR FRIEND ‫AND NOW YOU TOO?
‫OH, BUMMER.
‫- UH, THAT'S WHY. ‫THAT'S WHY I DIDN'T TELL YOU.
‫BECAUSE THE LOOK DAD'S ‫GIVING ME.
‫- WHAT LOOK?
‫- THE LOOK ‫OF UTTER DISAPPOINTMENT.
‫- JENNA, I'M SO SORRY.
‫I CAN'T BELIEVE ‫YOU DIDN'T GET IN.
‫- ME EITHER. ‫YOU PUKED ON SOMEONE'S DESK
‫AND YOU MADE THE CUT.
‫DOESN'T SEEM FAIR, ‫DOES IT?
‫- SLOW YOUR ROLL, COWGIRL.
‫I WORKED MY TYPE-A ASS ‫OFF FOR FOUR YEARS.
‫YOU JUST GOT YOUR [bleep] ‫TOGETHER FOUR MONTHS AGO.
‫- SORRY, I COULDN'T TELL ‫IF IT WAS THE FOUR YEARS
‫OF HARD WORK OR THE BS ‫DOCTOR NOTES YOU SENT IN.
‫- OKAY, I'M GOING TO GO ‫BEFORE YOU SAY
‫SOMETHING ELSE ‫YOU'LL REGRET.
‫CALL ME ‫WHEN YOU CALM DOWN.
‫- YOU NEED TO CALM DOWN.
‫- I CAN'T, TYLER!
‫SADIE'S RIGHT.
‫EVERYONE IN MY FAMILY ‫IS A GIANT LIAR.
‫- CHILDREN, ‫WHERE ARE YOU?
‫A NEW CROP OF SINNERS ‫HAVE ARRIVED.
‫- SORRY.
‫TYLER AND I HAD TO... ‫GO POTTY.
‫- THAT'S IT.
‫IF YOU WON'T LISTEN ‫TO YOUR PARENTS,
‫YOU'RE GOING TO ‫A CHRISTIAN BOARDING SCHOOL,
‫WHERE YOU WILL LISTEN ‫TO GOD.
‫- I'M SORRY IF MY RELATIONSHIP ‫WITH TYLER UPSETS YOU GUYS.
‫BUT I'D RATHER GO ‫TO BOARDING SCHOOL
‫THAN NOT BE OPEN ‫ABOUT THE PERSON I LOVE.
‫A LIFE WHERE YOU CAN'T ‫BE HONEST ABOUT WHO YOU ARE
‫IS LIKE LIVING IN A STUPID ‫HELL TENT OF YOUR OWN MAKING.
‫- LOVEBUN, THERE'S SOMETHING ‫I'VE GOT TO TELL YOU.
‫- WHAT IS IT, JOE?
‫- WELL...
‫WOW, THIS IS ‫A LOT HARDER THAN I THOUGHT.
‫- FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST, ‫JUST SAY IT, DARLING.
‫- SATAN HAS ‫MADE ME AFFLICTED
‫WITH A VERY POWERFUL ‫ATTRACTION TO MEN.
‫BUT DON'T WORRY.
‫BECAUSE I HAVE DECIDED TO ‫ATTEND A CHRISTIAN RETREAT
‫WHERE THEY CAN CURE ‫HOMOSEXUALITY.
‫BECAUSE I'LL DO ‫WHATEVER IT TAKES
‫TO KEEP THIS FAMILY ‫TOGETHER.
‫EVEN IF IT MEANS ‫SPENDING HOURS OF REPENTANCE
‫WITH OTHER WAYWARD MEN.
‫- [sobs]
‫- SHH, SHH, SHH, SHH. ‫HEY,
‫I'LL BE A MISSIONARY.
‫IT'LL BE FUN.
‫- HEY.
‫- CAN I SIT DOWN?
‫- SURE.
‫- I KNOW YOU'RE BUMMED ‫YOU DIDN'T GET INTO SCU.
‫BUT HERE'S ‫THE SILVER LINING:
‫ALL THE PAIN YOU'RE FEELING ‫WILL FUEL YOUR WRITING.
‫- BUT HOW MUCH PAIN ‫IS A WRITER SUPPOSED TO TAKE?
‫I MEAN, I'M NOT EVEN ‫OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL YET,
‫AND I ALREADY FEEL ‫LIKE I'VE HAD MY FILL.
‫- [chuckles] ‫A LOT.
‫BEING A PROFESSIONAL WRITER ‫IS A FREAKING NIGHTMARE.
‫IT'S FILLED ‫WITH NEVER-ENDING REJECTION.
‫ONLY AN INSANE PERSON ‫WOULD PURSUE IT.
‫BUT GUESS WHAT? ‫I DIDN'T HAVE A CHOICE.
‫TELLING STORIES IS ‫THE ONLY WAY I KNOW HOW
‫TO MAKE SENSE ‫OF THE WORLD AROUND ME.
‫DON'T YOU FEEL ‫THE SAME WAY?
‫- YEAH, I GUESS I DO.
‫- THEN YOU'RE GOING ‫TO BE FINE.
‫I'M NOT WORRIED ‫ABOUT YOU, JENNA.
‫- THANK YOU.
‫- LISTEN, JAKE, ‫IF I HAD KNOWN
‫YOU WERE IN HIGH SCHOOL, ‫I NEVER WOULD HAVE KISSED YOU.
‫- I'M SORRY ‫FOR NOT TELLING YOU.
‫[chuckles] ‫IT'S JUST YOU'RE SO HOT.
‫I-I GOT CAUGHT UP ‫IN THE MOMENT.
‫- YOU'RE A GOOD-LOOKING ‫YOUNG MAN.
‫I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE ‫YOU'RE SO YOUNG.
‫- I'M NOT THAT YOUNG. ‫I'M 18.
‫BUT I GET IT, ‫AND I'LL SEE YOU AROUND.
‫- WAIT, YOU'RE 18?
‫- YEAH.
‫- OH, THANK GOD.
‫- OH, THAT MEANS WE CAN'T ‫GET IN TROUBLE, RIGHT?
‫- LEGALLY WE'RE FINE. ‫MORALLY...EH.
‫- WHAT?
‫COME ON.
‫- OH, SCREW IT.
‫- THANKS FOR ‫THE RIDE HOME.
‫- YEAH, NO WORRIES.
‫ARE YOU OKAY?
‫YOU SEEM A LITTLE BUMMED.
‫- YEAH, I GUESS I'VE JUST BEEN ‫A LITTLE DOWN ON MYSELF LATELY.
‫- YEAH, ME TOO.
‫IN FACT, I WAS GOING ‫TO ASK YOU SOMETHING.
‫WHY DID YOU GO OUT ‫WITH ME?
‫- DON'T PLAY DUMB.
‫- I'M NOT.
‫- YOU KNOW WHY.
‫BECAUSE YOU'RE ‫MATTY MCKIBBEN.
‫- THANKS, BUT APPARENTLY
‫THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH ‫FOR GABBY.
‫- YOU MEAN INTIMIDATION ‫NATION GABBY?
‫- OKAY, IS THERE LIKE ‫A CLUB
‫WHERE YOU GUYS MEET ‫AND NAME EVERYTHING?
‫- I THOUGHT YOU WEREN'T ‫DOING RELATIONSHIPS THIS YEAR.
‫- WHO SAID RELATIONSHIPS?
‫I CAN BARELY GET THE GIRL ‫TO TALK TO ME.
‫I MEAN, ‫WHAT THE [bleep]?
‫I MEAN, DID I PEAK ‫JUNIOR YEAR OR SOMETHING?
‫[chuckles]
‫- MATTY, I DIDN'T ‫GET INTO SCU.
‫- AW, I'M SORRY.
‫I THINK THEY GET ‫THEIR ANSWERS OUT SO EARLY
‫BECAUSE THEY JUST ‫TOSS A COIN.
‫COME ON, YOU HAVEN'T EVEN HEARD ‫FROM THE BEST SCHOOLS YET.
‫AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
‫I REALLY THINK YOU ‫DODGED A BULLET.
‫- WHY?
‫- DUDE, HAVE YOU SEEN ‫THEIR SCHOOL MASCOT?
‫IT'S A FRICKING MOTH.
‫HOW EMBARRASSING IS THAT? ‫[chuckles]
‫- WELL, THANKS.
‫DO YOU WANT TO COME IN? ‫- I CAN'T.
‫I WILL BE AT HOME ‫TRYING TO FIGURE OUT
‫HOW TO GET ‫MY SWAG BACK.
‫- OKAY.
‫WELL, I'LL TALK ‫TO YOU LATER.
‫- BYE.
‫- * I CAN PREACH
‫* TAKE ME WITH YOU ‫WHEN YOU GO *
‫- WITH NO PLANS OF ‫PLATONIC MATTY DISTRACTION,
‫IT WAS TIME ‫TO MOVE ON
‫AND PUSH EJECT ON THIS DAY ‫OF REJECTION.
‫- YES, HER NAME IS JENNA ‫WITH TWO Ns.
‫I'D LIKE TO TALK TO THE DIRECTOR ‫OF ADMISSIONS, PLEASE.
‫- YOU MADE A BIG MISTAKE, ‫BUDDY. BIG.
‫- MOM, DAD, ‫PUT THE PHONE DOWN NOW.
‫- LOOK, WE'RE SORRY, HONEY. ‫WE DIDN'T MEAN TO EMBARRASS YOU.
‫WE JUST WANTED TO KNOW WHY ‫YOU DIDN'T GET IN.
‫- I WISH I COULD SEND ‫THAT ADMISSIONS BOARD
‫A BIG STEAMING PILE ‫OF [bleep]!
‫- YOU GUYS, IT'S OKAY.
‫IT'S NOT SCU'S FAULT, ‫IT'S MINE.
‫LET'S BE HONEST, MY JUNIOR YEAR ‫GRADES WERE NOT GREAT,
‫AND I DIDN'T HAVE ANY ‫EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITIES
‫UNTIL THIS YEAR.
‫I UNDERSTAND THEIR DECISION.
‫SO THANK YOU, DAD, ‫FOR DRIVING ME UP TO CAMPUS
‫AND SHOWING ME AROUND
‫AND, MOM, FOR BEING THERE ‫AND SUPPORTING ME.
‫NOW, LET'S JUST ‫FORGET IT, OKAY?
‫- [sniffs]
‫- WOW, I'M SO PROUD ‫OF YOU.
‫YOU'RE HANDLING ‫THIS REJECTION VERY WELL.
‫- WELL, IF I'M GOING ‫TO BE A WRITER,
‫I BETTER GET USED TO IT.
‫IT WAS THEN THAT I REALIZED ‫REJECTION IS EASIER TO ACCEPT
‫WHEN YOU'RE HONEST WITH YOURSELF ‫ABOUT THE REASONS WHY.
‫AND I KNEW SOMEONE WHO REALLY ‫DESERVED SOME CLARITY.
‫LISTEN, I'M SORRY ‫TO BE SUCH A STALKER
‫AND SHOW UP ‫AT YOUR HOUSE LIKE THIS,
‫BUT I TRIED TO TALK TO YOU ‫AT SCHOOL--
‫- JENNA, IT'S--IT'S OKAY. ‫WHAT'S UP?
‫- I'M SORRY ABOUT ‫WHAT HAPPENED EARLIER.
‫I HAD A REALLY BAD DAY ‫AND I TOOK IT OUT ON YOU,
‫AND YOU DIDN'T ‫DESERVE THAT.
‫- WHAT HAPPENED?
‫- I DIDN'T GET INTO SCU.
‫- OH, MAN, I-I'M SORRY.
‫- IT'S FINE.
‫I HAVE ACCEPTED IT ‫AND I'M MOVING ON.
‫- GOOD. YOU CAN'T LET ‫SOME DUMB PEOPLE
‫ON A COLLEGE ACCEPTANCE ‫BOARD HAVE, LIKE,
‫TOTAL POWER OVER ‫YOUR FEELINGS.
‫- IT'S HARD NOT TO. ‫- JENNA, I'VE BEEN TOLD "NO"
‫MORE TIMES THAN I CAN COUNT.
‫LIKE, PRETTY RECENTLY.
‫SO, YEAH, YOU KNOW, ‫IT SUCKS FOR A MINUTE,
‫BUT THEN, I DON'T KNOW, ‫I GET A FEELING
‫THAT IT'LL ALL WORK OUT.
‫AND I'M NOT JUST GONNA STOP ‫GOING AFTER THE THINGS I WANT.
‫SO YOU SHOULDN'T ‫EITHER, OKAY?
‫- I WON'T. ‫I PROMISE.
‫- OKAY.
‫- WHOA. WHO KNEW OWEN ‫WAS THIS CONFIDENT?
‫IT FELT SO GOOD ‫TO HAVE HIM BELIEVE IN ME.
‫IT FELT...SO GOOD.
‫WOW, REALLY GOOD.
‫- * I'LL GET YOU STARTED *
‫* WE CAN'T STAY ‫BROKENHEARTED *
‫- NEXT ON AWKWARD...
‫- SENIOR BONFIRE TONIGHT.
‫- THE GUYS KEEP ‫A "HOT OR NOT" LIST
‫IN A BIG BOOK ‫CALLED "THE PHONE BOOK."
‫- WHAT JERK HATE-RATED YOU?
‫- YOU CODED ME?
‫- HEY, BEAUTIFUL.
‫- TOO BAD HITTING THAT
‫WOULD BE A ONE-WAY TICKET ‫TO COUGAR TOWN.
‫- WELL, APPARENTLY ‫ALL I AM TO YOU IS A NUMBER.
‫- I MADE A DUDE DATABASE
‫WITH EVERY GUY AT PHSS'S ‫PROFILE PIC.
‫I'M GONNA HATE-RATE THE [bleep] ‫OUTTA THESE JOCKOFFS.